Martin P. Lumbridge (not his real name) persists in writing about film even though he has no professional qualifications or compelling reason to be believed. Expect spoilers.
The Woods Have Legs – Three Films
by Martin | December 3, 2016 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
Blair Witch The woods! A simple enough phrase but so ominously evocative – I was quite intrigued on discovering that director Adam Wingard and writer Simon Barrett's film The Woods was due to premiere at Frightfest this year. I found much to enjoy in Barrett/Wingard's...
L’il Quinquin
by Martin | January 18, 2015 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
My jaw dropped when I heard that divisive auteur Bruno Dumont's next film would be a comedy about cops, and remained in that state throughout the three-hour plus length of the film (actually a four-part TV series, served up in a single showing at the London Film...
The Bat (1959)
by Martin | March 4, 2017 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
This comes from a cheap and pretty random box set of 'horror' DVD's I got as a Secret Santa present – thanks, Lorraine! - so there's no frills here, no trailer or 'Making Of': they barely manage to give you the film itself. Which is bad anyway, so creaky you can...
Salvo
by Martin | April 26, 2014 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
Mafia hitman Salvo (Saleh Bakri) kills a guy but instead of despatching his sister Rita (Sara Serraiocco) - a witness to the crime - he chooses to hide her in an abandoned factory and keep her fed and watered. Why? Love? Pity? Or is he caught on the horns of a...
The Voices
by Martin | May 4, 2015 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
A toy factory worker in a small American town, Jerry (Ryan Reynolds) is your standard eager-to-please psychotic passing for normal, at least until he starts ticking the box marked ‘serial killer’ by stabbing his indifferent love-object (Gemma Arterton) to death and...
Death Bed: The Bed That Eats (1977)
by Martin | September 16, 2017 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
Outside the screen at the BFI stands horror film critic and musician Stephen Thrower (author of several enormous books on horror films which I would love to read if only I had the time - and money) next to a cake in the shape of a four-poster bed - though smaller, of...
The Devil Outside / Permanent Green Light
by Martin | March 16, 2019 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
THE DEVIL OUTSIDE In writer-director Andrew Hulme's second film (after gangster drama Snow In Paradise, which I haven't seen but will be sure to catch up with – no doubt on London Live - one day) our adolescent hero Robert (Noah Carson) finds the disconnect between...
The Witch
by Martin | April 9, 2016 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
I saw this at the Odeon Covent Garden. Amazingly, they are only charging £6.00 a ticket at the moment for any showing Monday to Thursday. I hope this doesn't get out, or my chances of getting an entire screen to myself (that ever-elusive dream) will diminish even...
Microwave Massacre (1983)
by Martin | June 18, 2017 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
It's a truism that when horror goes wrong it can easily turn into comedy – but what happens when a horror comedy goes wrong? Microwave Massacre, available on Arrow Video, provides one possible answer - a vision of Hell made all the more hellish by the awareness that...
Sleepaway Camp (1983)
by Martin | March 20, 2016 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
This was prefaced by a talk from BFI programmer Michael Blyth around LBGT horror which pleasingly focused on less obvious titles – The Ghost Ship, Homicidal, Alucarda – even if he did seem to be stretching a point sometimes. Passing allusions to Dr. Jekyll And Mister...