Martin P. Lumbridge (not his real name) persists in writing about film even though he has no professional qualifications or compelling reason to be believed. Expect spoilers.
Aaaaaaaah!
by Martin | March 20, 2016 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
Two men (Steve Oram and Tom Meeten) who only communicate in ape-like grunts, are in the woods mourning the passing of a loved one (we assume) by pissing on a framed photo of her. That done, they set off into the city, to bring (so we might imagine) their primitive...
Downton Abbey (2019) / Ray and Liz (2018)
by Martin | April 7, 2021 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
DOWNTON ABBEY For many years the TV series Downton Abbey, created by Julian Fellowes, mined the Sunday night craving for reassurance about the past, presenting it as a world in which everyone knew their place. The past, at least the past we never knew personally, is a...
The Body Stealers (1969)
by Martin | June 11, 2016 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
I seem to remember this showing late at night on ITV back in the 70's, but I never bothered to stay up watching it, and quite rightly as I was surely too young to appreciate how bad it is. Now it's showing on a Saturday morning on Movies4men, at a time when, back in...
Koko-Di-Koko-Da / Swallow
by Martin | December 15, 2019 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
KOKO-DI-KOKO-DA (LONDON FILM FESTIVAL 2019) Johannes Nyholm's film starts with a mother, Erin (Ylva Gallon) suffering a bout of food poisoning which leaves her face swollen so that she looks, as her husband Tobias (Leif Edlund Johansson) jests, like Freddy Kruger. The...
Power Games: The Childhood of a Leader and The Student
by Martin | February 18, 2017 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
THE CHILDHOOD OF A LEADER This is out on DVD now, I discovered it in Sainsbury's, the cast staring balefully out at me from the cover and seeming to condemn me for my lack of professionalism in not getting round to review this back in September 2016, when I...
Crazy About Love: Fingernails, Vincent Must Die, and Tchaikovsky’s Wife
by Martin | March 3, 2024 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
FINGERNAILS Love is lighter than air, sings Stephen Merritt of The Magnetic Fields. It floats away when you let go. Love therefore needs to be grounded: in Greek director Christos Nikou's follow-up to his debut film Apples it is grounded in having your fingernails...
Frightfest 2015 Day One
by Martin | September 12, 2015 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
The Rotten Link Raulo and Roberta (Luis Ziembrowski and Paula Brasca) are two unlikely siblings: a simple-minded hulk, he looks old enough to be her father while she is a pretty young thing barely out of her teens. But they fit into their isolated Argentinian...
Tales That Witness Madness (1973)
by Martin | June 15, 2019 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
In 1965 Dr. Terror's House of Horrors kicked off a series of 'anthology' horror films, mostly made by Amicus, of which Tales That Witness Madness (not made by Amicus) is often dismissed as a peculiarly ropey example, although its director Freddie Francis - who also...
Arrival
by Martin | March 18, 2017 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
Denis Villeneuve's Arrival brings to our attention something about contact with alien life forms that to my knowledge hasn't been thoroughly explored up until now – how boring it might be. That's not to say that the film itself is boring – although it does hover on...
Mirror Mirror (1990) / Happy Deathday (2017) / Thelma (2017)
by Martin | September 9, 2018 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
MIRROR MIRROR 'Long may it continue', I said earlier in the year about the BFI's 'Cult' strand. Well now it has ended (though replaced by something very similar called Terror Vision) but at least its last showing, curated by feminist film collective the Final Girls,...