Martin P. Lumbridge (not his real name) persists in writing about film even though he has no professional qualifications or compelling reason to be believed. Expect spoilers.
Fur: An Imaginary Portrait of Diane Arbus (2006)
by Martin | June 18, 2014 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
Who the hell's Diane Arbus? If this is your reaction to the above title, then you probably won't get much out of this film. I knew little about Diane Arbus, and having seen the film, now feel that I know less. Which is not the film's fault. It begins with a disclaimer...
Santo in the Wax Museum (1963) / Santo Vs. The She-Wolves (1976)
by Martin | August 21, 2020 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
Just when you thought it was safe to go back to the cinema... it IS safe. Oppressively so. I don't know about you but walking into a room full of people in surgical masks doesn't 'make me feel safe' – it makes me feel uneasy. And so I haven't joined the rush to get...
LOCKDOWN! The Giant Claw (1957)
by Martin | April 24, 2020 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
How often have I fantasized about the government forbidding me to leave the house so that I am finally compelled to watch all the DVDs I have accumulated over the years? Well never, since that would have been absurd, even for a fantasy. Nevertheless here we are. Or at...
Aaaaaaaah!
by Martin | March 20, 2016 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
Two men (Steve Oram and Tom Meeten) who only communicate in ape-like grunts, are in the woods mourning the passing of a loved one (we assume) by pissing on a framed photo of her. That done, they set off into the city, to bring (so we might imagine) their primitive...
The Devil’s Rain (1975)
by Martin | April 26, 2015 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
I've taken to listening to Shaun Keaveny on BBC6 Music in the mornings, via my TV – specifically Freeview 707. A couple of months ago my just-awoken fingers were fumblingly pressing those figures out on the remote and hesitated too long, inadvertently accessing 70, at...
Monster On The Campus (1958)
by Martin | May 1, 2016 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
This begins with college professor Donald Blake (Arthur Franz) completing his collection of busts depicting the various stages of human evolution with one of 'Modern Woman', taken from his fiancée's face. Subsequently, as if this is the peak of evolution and there's...
Three Against Nature
by Martin | June 10, 2018 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
THE SAILOR WHO FELL FROM GRACE WITH THE SEA (1976) 'An insult to any audience' concludes the review of Lewis John Carlino's film The Sailor Who Fell From Grace With The Sea (hereafter referred to as Sailor) in my damaged-in-transit Waterstones-freebie edition of the...
Frightfest 2016 Day Two
by Martin | October 22, 2016 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
FURY OF THE DEMON On day two I returned unaccompanied to Shepherd's Bush as Dave had to get up early on Sunday, but another recurring character in this blog - Michael Blyth, BFI cult film programmer - was sitting nearby for the first two screenings, which was oddly...
Barbican Nights: Into The Woods Part Two
by Martin | August 5, 2017 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
EYES OF FIRE (1986) This, Josh Saco explains, is a 'lost' film, and just because it is here tonight screening in front of us that doesn't mean it has been found again. I mean, who are we to 'find' it? Even the director, Avery Crounse, was happy to let it go and move...
The Revenant
by Martin | May 29, 2016 | movies, reviews | 0 Comments
Early reports of this film had audiences scandalised by the sight of star Leonardo di Caprio being raped by a bear. Three times. I suspect that this was hype worked up by the studio's marketing department, but I suppose it depends on whether you think people are more...