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Martin P. Lumbridge (not his real name) persists in writing about film even though he has no professional qualifications or compelling reason to be believed. Expect spoilers.

The Voices

A toy factory worker in a small American town, Jerry (Ryan Reynolds) is your standard eager-to-please psychotic passing for normal, at least until he starts ticking the box marked ‘serial killer’ by stabbing his indifferent love-object (Gemma Arterton) to death and...

Norte: The End Of History

'You do know this film is four hours and ten minutes long?', asked the man doling out the tickets at the ICA. In fact, I knew about the four hours but not the ten minutes – but I said yes. He advised me to go to the toilet beforehand, as if I needed to be told. That...

Frightfest 2016 Day Two

FURY OF THE DEMON On day two I returned unaccompanied to Shepherd's Bush as Dave had to get up early on Sunday, but another recurring character in this blog - Michael Blyth, BFI cult film programmer - was sitting nearby for the first two screenings, which was oddly...

Frightfest Halloween 2018

Yes I know, we are already well into 2019 but let me take you back, BACK to when the self-service checkouts in Poundland were still speaking in the voice of Bela Lugosi ('Have a spooooky day!') In truth I wasn't all that inspired by the films on offer at Frightfest...

Bone Tomahawk / Chronic

There is, or there was, a 'projection issue' in the Curzon Bloomsbury's Phoenix Screen. A sheet of A4 paper warns you of it just before you go in – though after you have paid for your ticket. It doesn't make it entirely clear, or maybe I didn't read it closely enough,...

Strongroom (1962)

Vernon Sewell's career in British film started, weirdly enough, with a German film - Morgenrot (1933) a collaboration with Gustav Klimt's illegitimate son (one of them) that premiered in front of Adolf Hitler. Apparently Hitler liked it. His next collaborative...

Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey / The Brain From Planet Arous (1957)

WINNIE THE POOH: BLOOD AND HONEY Not all bad films are good. The inspiration behind Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey was apparently writer-director Rhys Frake-Waterfield's understanding that A.A. Milne's characters were going out of copyright, and so fair game for...

Arrival

Denis Villeneuve's Arrival brings to our attention something about contact with alien life forms that to my knowledge hasn't been thoroughly explored up until now – how boring it might be. That's not to say that the film itself is boring – although it does hover on...

BFI London Film Festival 2017: Good Manners

The first film by Brazilian directorial duo Juliana Rojas and Marco Dutra was 2011's Hard Labour in which a woman's attempt to get her small business (a grocery store) off the ground is undermined by the corpse of a werewolf lurking behind one of the walls – and also...

The Witch

I saw this at the Odeon Covent Garden. Amazingly, they are only charging £6.00 a ticket at the moment for any showing Monday to Thursday. I hope this doesn't get out, or my chances of getting an entire screen to myself (that ever-elusive dream) will diminish even...